I bruise easily.
I’m not quite sure why I take pictures of my injuries all the time. There is this pressing need to document the evidence of my physical pain. Each mark represents an experience in my life, ranging from the mundane accidental walk into a wall to the brutal reality of an assault.
Sometimes I get so wrapped up in my thoughts that I forget I have a body. I know that sounds strange but it’s not uncommon for someone with PTSD to struggle with bouts of such disassociation. For me it’s like I have moments where I need to consciously remind myself that my body is a part of me and not only is it okay to feel things within it- but that it’s actually normal!
Perhaps I’m trying to reconnect with my body by acknowledging and preserving the proof of what it has been through. I can remember what I thought and felt emotionally when I received the injury or first noticed the abrasion. Then I can marry that memory to the mark and understand what happened.
Yes I’ve been hurt, but I’ve also healed. The bruises eventually fade. But I still feel the need to hold on to these pictures as a reminder. Look what you’ve overcome.